Warming Humor Pillows

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

'There, that should freak 'em out.'

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

'That was quite a snow storm last night.'

'It's easy, just wee!'

"I love this time of year."

"She was a rescue."

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"I'll admit I've packed on a few extra pounds, but it's only water weight."

Weather today.

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

Well, technically, no, you don't have seasonal affective disorder.

A diuretic! Are you sure about this?

Snowman about snowman fallen on ice: 'Obviously they would have had time to clear the ice.'

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

"Normally, applying heat would be the correct therapy, however..."

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"It's freezing out here - can I come in?"

'Didn't I warn you not to have the vindaloo?'

Outdoor Dining: Winter Edition

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

Frosty decides to have a carrot job

'Another botched Snotox injection...'

It's a bit derivative.

Valentines Day Cats

'No, you heard me right. I need my air conditioner fixed not my heater.'

An elderly woman with a heart-shaped ear trumpet

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

Church Parking Sign for Midnight Mass