Wands Pillows

Magicians monkey.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Twenty Six

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

"But I use all of them!"

"It's the kind of missile system that says, 'Hey, these peace negotiations aren't really going very well.'"

'I told you I knew what nine sevens is...'

"I'm your Furry Godmother."

Progress?

Emma Watson

Weapons of War Through the Ages.

"Gosh! Look what he's done to his Harry Potter books..."

Paving over the window-box

A dog whose nose is a gun.

Ancient Weapons

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

The Diet Fairy is here to grant you three dishes. . . as long as they're under 350 calories each.

Panzer Hut.

Really big bang

'I went window shopping today. I came home with four double glazed units!'

Next time I get to choose the weapon first.

"With a wave of my magic wand, I declare all government programs free."

"For health and safety reasons, the outer casing is no longer made of lead as we now know this is a very harmful metal."

'You say you are going after Sharp-tooth tigers? You better use my magnum.'

'I'm here to test the magic 8-ball.'

Little did Fred know that he was igniting a corporate paper wad fight that would eventually cost the company 629 million in lost production time and force the closure of 21 branch offices.

Light Artillery

The art of wrapping.

"Next time, I get to choose the weapon first."

Medusa curling her snake hair with curling tongs

"Darn, men! How often must I repeat it!? Blow!! Never suck!"

'Have you considered having double glacier installed?'

'We're running over budget. Better board up all the other windows, too.'

'It's almost unfair. . . their swords aren't even pointy.'