Wall Street Wizards Gifts

"The market was doing so well I decided not to hibernate this year."

'After twenty years the only thing I've learned from reading stock chars is that there is nothing to learn from reading stock charts.'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

'See how the fools flee when fantasy role-play is fantasy no longer!'

'Well, Frobisher, it's taken a millennium, but thanks to our initial public stock offering, we've finally turned lead into gold.'

'Personally I think one great improvement to these tea dances would be some tables.'

"At the end of the day Simon, money talks!"

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

'Excuse me, it's 1-2-3, 1-2-3, not bum-tit-tit, bum-tit-tit!'

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

Woman dancing with a hot water bottle.

'So, in 2079 you see the company breaking even. Can you give me some idea where you see things 10 years after that?'

'Toys?! Good heavens, no! I made my fortune through commercial endorsements.'

'The 'free market' economic theory is falling!'

'You simply put up a minimum of $2,500. If the price of fish goes up, your investment goes up. If the price of the fish goes down, your investment goes down.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

"We're a hedge fund, Mr Marney, so I'm putting your allocation at 30% stocks, 30% bonds, and 40% bushes."

"Today big pharma stocks rose on news 'down' is a state of mind that can be treated by pharmaceuticals."

The New Square Mile Regulator.

'But the short term view is very good.'

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

Johann Strauss II

"After the crash I wanted to shoot myself... but I could not afford the bullet."

''Willie the Wizard' gets out next week -- get ready to change all the locks.'

"The market was unstable today, the brokers were unstable and the public was unstable. Analysts believe this is the new normal."

"But if you teach him to fish, you have fed him for a lifetime."

'I'm saving up for a hedge.'

Ask About our Free Investment Advice: 'The free investment advice is buy low and sell high. We offer more detailed investment advice for a fee.'

"Do you ever try to explain to your kids that you spend all day buying and selling things you don't have?"