Voicemail Victor Pillows

"Thank you for calling the honesty foundation, your call in unimportant to us, so leave a message for us to laugh at when you hear the tone..."

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

"I love this work-from-home concept. Now I can fire someone without going to the office."

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

'This is a prerecorded message. Thank you for rubbing me. Please state your name and your wish. I will get back to you as soon as possible.'

"What do you mean: 'You don't believe that this is my answerphone'? Do you think I'd lie?"

'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'

'This is Jake. I'm not in now, so please leave a message...HELLO! HELLO! This is Jake! Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm just mesin' with you! I'm still NOT in!'

"Before you leave for your vacation, re-record your extended leave message. The one you just made is too giddy."

'A real person's answered it. I hate that. I'll call back when their voicemail's activated.'

'I'm away from my desk. At the sound, please leave a message.' (Man has horn in his hand).

"I can't find my stupid phone, so leave a message..."

'Neat! Which ones are the bad guys?'

"From now on we will name you Alpha, Beta, Gamma and Delta!"

Swine Flu Vaccine Too Late.

'Click! I'm out right now.'

No Vaccination

'She's out. Who shall I say was going to listen?'

COVID SOS

'Oh - you're there! I was hoping I could just leave a message.'

"Please go to voicemail...please go to voice...Oh Hi...so glad I caught you!"

"This is the voicemail of Michel Barnier.For angry drunk ranting, press 1. For separate, weepy pleading, press 2. To just sorta breathe heavily into the phone for an extended period, press 3."

'His sister beat him playing a video game.'

Guinea beats Ebola

"Thank you for calling your father. If this is an emergency, press 1. If you need money, press 2. To speak about your general life updates, please stay on the line: your mother will be with you shortly."

"You got that many points on a galactic battle? Really? I was beaten by a girl?"

Clap for the N.H.S.

"...You caught me at a bad time. I accidentally picked up the phone instead of letting voicemail answer it."

'Please leave a message after the beep and this short advertisement...'