Voice Recognition Enthusiast Pillows

Bark processing.

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"Siri meets Alexa" "What can I help you with?" "I'm sorry, I can't answer that."

"It's not so much the chewing that offends me, it's the mocking of our voices."

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

The passing of a radio/tv personality.

"I hope they read the fine print that the audiobook is to be voiced by Morgan Freeman."

Heavenly voices.

'Now he'll learn to spealie Bill Gates.'

Jazz singer.

'I always feel I could have taken credit for more.'

'Believe me, I'd like to hire you. But if you're only skill is talking like Bugs Bunny, you don't have a chance.'

"They're voice-activated. I bark, they jump."

'I have nothing against you being helium. It's your voice, Steven. Your squeaky, high voice!'

'No, you being from overseas wouldn't stop me going on a date with you...Whoa!! But that would! Quite a high voice for a guy.'

'What does LOTI mean?"

An Adam's Melon

"Since I deeply value recognition, I'm honored to present this 'Outstanding Effort' award to what's-his-name here."

At 100 years old, Ceil pretty much spoke her mind...

"[...] That one looks like a grade four glioblastoma multiforme!" "Brain surgeons looking at clouds"

'I wonder which dopey voice he's going to use this time.'

"You can have this speech recognition software back. I said 'turn off' and my wife slapped me."

Employee of the month.

"Look, Howard, this phone has speech recognition just like you do, but it's much more intuitive!"

'Oh, you WERE singing?... Sorry, I thought you were clearing your throat.'

"That means you have to write it, and also do the voice-over."

'I've always wanted to be a politician, but I speak in a low voice.'

Chat Lines - "If you would like to talk to a machine that sounds like a woman press 1. If you would like.."

'I am not lying! This is a real live person speaking!'