Voice Lover Gifts

Sign in a bookshop window offers chance to meet the narrator of the audio book.

I've fallen in love with your voice, but unfortunately, things can probably never work out between us. I'm a cartoon, and you're recording.

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

MLK

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

Punctuation Karaoke Night

'Vote for me. I'm ready, and willing. Two out of three isn't bad.'

Chorister's Loose Teeth

'Now that we've learned to talk, we can have FOCUS GROUPS!'

The passing of a radio/tv personality.

Heaven

'I'm dreading the World Cup . . .'

A family choir

A singer being criticised

Bar Therapy

'Well, one of us in wrong.'

"I've found my voice, Penny. It's deep, wise, and compassionate."

"I'm going to need even less tuba."

After talking one stranger to death, Velma starts in on the next.

Heavenly voices.

"I hope they read the fine print that the audiobook is to be voiced by Morgan Freeman."

Morgan Freeman

cat singing into microphone

"The Choir Director's out sick, so they're all a but lost."

Old MacDonald had a startup.

"The concept is simple. People call in with questions on existece and reality , and you respond with total silence."

Tutti: When all voices sing at the same time.

Ok, I'm back. Sorry about the screaming.

And what kind of banter do you want with that? I got light, witty, or wry. Breakfast.

"Don't worry, it's just a phrase she's going through."

"These choir robes are so hot, I'm glad I went commando."