Talk Lover Gifts

In his speeches, the shortest distance between two points is about forty-five minutes. (Published originally August 16, 2007.)

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

MLK

Exciting potato bugs.

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

Sign in a bookshop window offers chance to meet the narrator of the audio book.

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID MAMET

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

'Vote for me. I'm ready, and willing. Two out of three isn't bad.'

"He's Right Behind Me, Isn't He?"

'Now that we've learned to talk, we can have FOCUS GROUPS!'

News and Magazines. Record Debt. Dollar Down. How can the dollar be weak when we've been giving it such a good workout?

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

Bar Therapy

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

After talking one stranger to death, Velma starts in on the next.

Bird Messaging

"I'm sorry I ever taught him to speak"

Ok, I'm back. Sorry about the screaming.

And what kind of banter do you want with that? I got light, witty, or wry. Breakfast.

Cartoons showing a speaker, with a teddy bear projected on a screen behind them. The speaker says: "welcome to my TED talk."

'Yes, I laugh at most things, but it doesn't mean I can't have a serious conversation...'

'Mind you, this isn't a secret I'd tell just everybody.'

'Wow, excellent turnout.'

'Let's go some place where we can walk.'

"Well, I'm an expert on communication!"

"I think it was Shakespeare who said 'A meadow that isn't just as lovely from the window of a bullet train isn't lovely at all.'"

'We may be old but the supermarket's automatic doors still acknowledge our existence, so we still matter.'