Visiting T-Shirts

'So Grandma's arrived then.'

'Kiss her on both cheeks, it won't hurt you!'

'Sorry we're late, we had trouble finding you.'

'Hey, a pot...ted plant. Bless you, my man.'

'Instead of me fending for myself at home, can't I come here and share your meals at the hospital?'

'Boy, this is a no-nonsense kind of place, isn't it?'

"The flower store was closed. You like rhubarb, right?"

"They're not fixing us another drink - They've gone to bed"

"It's good to see the grandkids, but they're sitting on my stumps."

"Not happy"

Swing by won't you?

Old lady at the door

'Time flies.'

'Hold it, their telly's on the blink too!'

"Should I tell Daddy you're here, or would you like to upset him youself?"

A ghost visits a man in a prison cell

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

"They said in exchange for my testimony against you, I won't have to do any jail time ??" aside from visiting you, of course."

"Hi, Mom, just popped by to see what you were doing."

'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

'I had a wonderful evening and I'm really sorry Ed's still looking for a parking spot.'

"That's it! Visiting time is over!"

...But don't et the door hit you on the way out.

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

Couple cuddle under a sprinkler with an umbrella as an excuse to be close

"A little help, please."

People who let their big dogs run around leash free and then say things like. . .

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

'Fancy us all being afraid of wasps when there's a WHOLE nest of 'em in my drinks cabinet!'

'Excuse me Ma'am, do you mind if I smoke?'

'Next!'

"We've combine the recovery area with the gift shop... just in case your visitors want to pick up a little souvenir."

'Couldn't you think of anything to say to Herb and Mary? They were nice enough to invite us over.'

'I didn't know ostriches could swim.'

"She looks just like in your photos."