Virus Buffs Pillows

'I can't remember if they wanted us to starve this one, or force-feed it.'

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

Wordplay: Gastropod.

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

'Are we there yet?'

"I'm going to get you fired."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'Hey, buddy, do you mind lending me a hand? I appear to be stuck in this thing.'

"It's good you're avoiding radioactive pieces of your destroyed home planet that deprive you of your superpowers... but you should also watch the sodium."

'Those fish-oil treatments doing your arthritis any good?'

'It's a deal. You don't infect me, and I don't infect you.'

Bees v Wasps

Flan-eating bacteria

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

"....and hold the garlic."

"I know you've been together a long time, but I'm sorry... Your microbiome can't follow you in."

Egg Buggy

'D'you have any salt?'

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Bacterial Cultural Center

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

"Now calm down Ma'am. If you want to report a murder I'll patch you through to Detective Malone in homicide. This is Sergeant Flanagan....Insecticide!"

So, have you had this 'human flu' yet?

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

"Uh-Oh!"