Virus Aficionado Pillows

How to win friends and Influenza People.

It's Time To Thank The Politicians!

Vlad the Inhaler

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

"I can't find my other boot. I need to be rebooted."

Astral Projection

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

Dracula vacationing in Venice feeding bats in the Piazza of St. Mark.

Twister:Rural Social Networking

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

"'C' is for free CONTENT!"

"It's very sweet of you to visit him. Mr. Mainframe doen't get out much since the desktops came in."

'A vampire bat! No kidding!'

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

Movie Monster Exhibit: Unavailable due to much needed repair work.

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

Until Bob entered her life, Lisa never even knew the meaning of the phrase 'acute multiple drug-resistant infection by transgenic Staphylococcus aureus.

Vampire Bat

"That news you're reading is 24 hours old. I can get it 23 hours and 57 minutes sooner online."

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

Lady vampire putting lipstick on in a mirror with no reflection

'...and do you solemnly swear to update your facebook status to 'married'?'

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

"To save you from destruction I will now wipe out mankind!"

Wifi Peacock

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

Happy Valentine's Day

"I didn't want you doing what you did on our last date."

Little Van Helsing was dissapointed that, again, there was no monster under the bed or in the closet.