Virtual Love Enthusiast Gifts

"Let's not screw up a wonderful relationship by meeting."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

"The days of 'herding cats' are over: my friends and I meet through video-conferencing now..."

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

"Darling Elizabeth! How I long to hold you betwixt my giant industrial clamps."

Online Dating for Dummies

People told me virtual dating was safe!

'We were matched by computer.'

"I'd like to meet the algorithm that thought we'd be a good match."

"We met online."

'I see from your profile that you are 5ft 3, have blond hair and like red wine.'

"Todd and I are doing our best to make it work by never meeting in real life."

"We are gathered here together in the presence of no one to join this couple in socially distant matrimony."

Valentine's day may be a bit different this year

"I'm going to be honest with you, Noah. I've been virtually seeing someone else."

Father Tim is enjoying the new normal a bit too much.

Cyber Sex

Carpal Tunnel of Love.

"I've got 200,000 Facebook followers, but not one real friend..."

'Do you, shoe online shop customer number 145583774, promise to love, honor and cherish electronic online shop customer number 9634217554...'

"I can't tell whether you're gazing into my eyes or checking your e-mail."

'I don't think we should rush into anything. Let's exchange photos first.'

The first one's my cybersex partner, the other's my bit on the side.

Zoom Wedding Crasher

"So what do you think about this coronaviruses thing"

"When I say we met online, I haven't physically seen him yet."

"I like dating on line - You don't have to get all dressed up."

"Touch anywhere to begin."

"Will we be skying each other tonight?"

'I think I like you better online.'

Cyberspace Romance

I actually met the girl of my dreams on the internet. Unfortunately, she was computer animated.

'Yes, my online profile does say I have a six-pack. It's in my fanny pack.'