Virtual Conversation Starter Gifts

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"You're such a good listener."

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"Global warming is a great icebreaker."

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

When did you first feel like a male trapped in a female body? When I was a foetus.

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"He gets easily abstracted."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."