Vintage Dating Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Everyone wants to bonk her!"

Cocktails on the verandah.

Sir Winston Churchill

Second hand furniture.

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

Military Medals

"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Early Piety

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

Grandma's caf

Ladies by the seaside

"I love these old decorations!"

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

The Young Ladies' Young Gentleman

"How soon will this be a remnant

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

A Footnote - Self Portrait of Beardsley, Bound to the God of Nature

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Remember, history was easier back in your day. There's so much more of it now."

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

'I know I complimented you on that outfit last time you wore it, but that was in 1980.'