Viking Enthusiasts Gifts

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

The Icelandic Answer

'Frankly, William, I am tired of dating the sensitive, needy types.'

'That's Olafson -- He's a mercenary.'

"You've got someone's shirt caught on your left horn."

'Our founder!' (A Viking)

"If only the men could see my fun side."

Tharg brings a note from his mother.

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

'Did we plunder any carbon credits?'

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

'Something bothering you, Bjornson?'

'Man, I hate 'Take Your Daughter to Work' day,'

You've got mail.

"Don't you worry about the dangers of spreading germs?"

"Don't get Thor about it, apparently it's quite common in Vikings of your age."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

Wotan with eye patch

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

'I miss the good old days!'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

"Hey team, meet our new V.P. of acquisitions and mergers." (businessman introducing a vicking, barbarian)

"But I use all of them!"

"And I suppose you forgot to bring home the milk."

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

'If all your friends were looting and pillaging, would you do it, too?'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

Stabbing an opera singer to hit the high notes.