Viking Culture Lover Gifts

What?… (No caption. One viking drinks a tropical drink from a fruity cup, while other vikings drink grog from mugs.)

'Well, once again he's led us to victory and... Oh, here we go. The obligatory Gatorade drenching.'

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

'I miss the good old days!'

"And I suppose you forgot to bring home the milk."

"But I use all of them!"

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

'If all your friends were looting and pillaging, would you do it, too?'

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

Stabbing an opera singer to hit the high notes.

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

Sif instantly regretted asking Thor to hang the picture.

"How the heck could you forget your sword?"

'Could you give us a push?'

"I don't care if you are on full alert, take that silly hat off before you tear the pillows to shreds!"

Gaah! You sank my longship!

"Do you think the world really is going to hell, or are we just getting old?"

"Connect A2 to B3, insert D3 into E5....I hate flat packs!"

"Magnus! How many times must I tell you...Skulls of your enemies go on the top rack!!!"

Viking in the dock: His barrister says: 'Your honour, my client was simply expanding his business interests. We object to the use of the word 'pillaging'.'

Viking River Raids

Really Early Vikings

"They say at least 80% of us are wearing the wrong size."

'So you have to ask yourself: do you feel lucky?...well do you, monk?'

"So that's five for bailing, and three for patching. If there are no objections, the chair will now hear arguments."

'You've had a bad day? Try being stuck in this house!'

"Run for your lives! It's the full 'Ring' cycle!!"