Viking Aficionados Gifts

"Little do they realize we no longer serve good King Frederick the Peacemaker but his son, Olav the Homicidal Maniac."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

Wotan with eye patch

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

'I miss the good old days!'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

"And I suppose you forgot to bring home the milk."

"But I use all of them!"

"Hey team, meet our new V.P. of acquisitions and mergers." (businessman introducing a vicking, barbarian)

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

'If all your friends were looting and pillaging, would you do it, too?'

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

Stabbing an opera singer to hit the high notes.

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

"I don't care if you are on full alert, take that silly hat off before you tear the pillows to shreds!"

Sif instantly regretted asking Thor to hang the picture.

Gaah! You sank my longship!

"How the heck could you forget your sword?"

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

'Could you give us a push?'

"Magnus! How many times must I tell you...Skulls of your enemies go on the top rack!!!"

"Do you think the world really is going to hell, or are we just getting old?"

Viking in the dock: His barrister says: 'Your honour, my client was simply expanding his business interests. We object to the use of the word 'pillaging'.'

Viking River Raids

"They say at least 80% of us are wearing the wrong size."

Really Early Vikings

'You've had a bad day? Try being stuck in this house!'

'So you have to ask yourself: do you feel lucky?...well do you, monk?'

"So that's five for bailing, and three for patching. If there are no objections, the chair will now hear arguments."