Vigilantes Gifts

"What's the point of being your sidekick if the courts won't recognize it?"

"Peter Parker is Spiderman! Clark Kent is Superman!! Bruce Wayne is Batman!"

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

Scarecrows guarding a field

"Beware of God"

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

'The opportunity to be fair and just is rewarding - but what I especially like is taking the law into my own hands.'

'You have voted, yes! Have your SHEEP voted!'

Coronavirus

"Jessica could you call Tech Support and ask when the lazer was last calibrated please?"

The Marks of Zorro

'She wasn't hoydening when she chuffed arrack.'

"Neighborhood Watch anti-violence meeting. Be there or else."

"I made my lawyer, best man. That way he can make sure I don't get too generous with my vows."

Masked intruder

'Looks like we've got another variant!'

"We've had complaints from the local residents regarding nuisance calls."

What a hypochondriac --- He's always turning on his "check engine" light!

"And just where did that extra vowel come from?"

"Okay punk, make my day"

Covid outbreaks in prisons

Gypsy wanting to tell the fortune of a man who is smoking and drinking

"Try again, Kemosabe. This time ease out clutch slowly."

It's time to return the humane rat trap.

A car being linched - By the time the law arrived the citizens had already dealt with public enemy no.1

Letching Lifeguard

Covidgilantes

Social Discipline.