Vow Vigilantes Gifts

"I made my lawyer, best man. That way he can make sure I don't get too generous with my vows."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"You're stealing from the rich and selling it to the poor on Craigslist?"

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

"Peter Parker is Spiderman! Clark Kent is Superman!! Bruce Wayne is Batman!"

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

Scarecrows guarding a field

You can relax now.

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

"Want to score some flu shots.?"

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

Anti-Vaxer

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

'Computer crime seems to be on the rise.'

Guns won't help

"You mean to tell me I can only vote against one Congressman?"

Coronavirus dancing around an EU flag

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

"Okay, Okay... the vaccine has side effects, but at least social distancing is guaranteed."

'Hacking into our system is one way to get my attention.'

"My goodness, Gurkenham! This is the worst case of identity theft I've ever seen!"

Omicron: "Viva 2022!"

"I do wish they'd hurry up with that vaccine, so I can get back to worrying about dying of something else."

"This one is for hacking into our enemy's hacks."

"When you're done cyberattacking, your PB&J, with crustd cut off, is waiting."

'The opportunity to be fair and just is rewarding - but what I especially like is taking the law into my own hands.'

A knight fights the Covid-19 virus.

'You have voted, yes! Have your SHEEP voted!'

Coronavirus

"Don't read it! He's phishing."

"Jessica could you call Tech Support and ask when the lazer was last calibrated please?"

Computer Crimes