Video Editing Gifts

"… and the last item on the pre-nuptial aggreement is, … he wants final cut on all home videos."

"They don't prevent crime, but the videos make great blooper reels."

I want to be a TV journalist...I think creative writig and video editing are what you need.

'Have you figured out our New Year's resolution?'

'Never mind how many hits you can get on Youtube!'

"That was Hadrian's wall. Now here we are crashing into the Great Wall of China."

Youtube ghost videos...

"Henderson just uploaded our New Year's Party to You Tube, boss."

"The video of our wedding now includes commentary."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Campaign for Plain English

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

Punctuation Police

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

Your resume begins Once Upon A Time...I like that!

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."