Vicarious Laugh Seeker Pillows

Comedy Vicar Competition

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"That'll be five bucks."

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"What did Jesus order?"

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"Projectile hairballing."

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

Drunk Barber

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

"Hey! Get back here!"

he used to belong to a cartoonist

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

Jerk Gene

"My next witness is his Google Assistant."

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

Bald Man Overcomb

Football heads...

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

'Hello. Law offices of Anderson, Avery, Baer, Barton, Baston, Caggly, Cooper ... drat, who comes after Cooper?'

When Stupid People Get an Idea

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

Comedy Store - Canned Laughter delivery.

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'