Veterinary Vibes Gifts

Lactose Intolerant

The height of fashion in 1796

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

"A CAT scan? Are you sure?"

"Fill it up!"

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

"I'm excited to get fixed at the vet, had no idea I was broken."

"I have spirit, yes I do. I have spirit, how 'bout you?"

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

'Don't worry, my baser instincts are in a surgical waste bin in Hoboken.'

'Like many studs of my generation, I have always had a love affair with the harmonica.'

"Dr. Eliot, would you let the dog out?"

A classic case of 'Cow-Worm'.

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'Peter it appears that you have an STD known as 'cottontail'.'

'Yes, Jeb, they do resemble the cow's symptoms...'

'The hills are alive with the sound of moo-sick!'

Annette von Droste-Hulshoff

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

ONE MORNING WHILE GETTING DRESSED,

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

'The brown one that smells like an old man.'

'Doctor, did you say 5 minutes of traction, or 5 hours?'

'Good thing you called me... Yes, they've mixed worming powder with your food...'

'In a pig's eye, you say!'

1876 - Alexander Graham Bell made the world's first telephone call.