Vet Visit Enthusiast Pillows

'Don't worry - it won't affect our health care.'

"Yes, you were in a breech position, and it was the first time I was really pleased to see the vet..."

"Pick me!"

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Canine Companion

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

"He's already getting attached to you."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Did you get my tweet?"

Lifestyles of the hamsters of the rich and famous.

"He was a sea rescue."

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'

Love Conquers All

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

"This is Blackjack, come in Yahtzee."

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

Pets.

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

Tamagotchi paralysis.

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

"She's a miniature."

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

Author's Bio-diversity.

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'