Vending Machine Conqueror Gifts

Stereotypical vendor.

Rage.

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Second lifeReal life.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

'Today's Odds' sign above a copier showing various odds for machine's malfunctions

"Wish granted. A cafeteria."

Man with money in hand reads instructions on 'Check prostate' vending machine

Access Denied!

Croc feed machine contains chickens for feeding crocodiles at croc farm.

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

"I'll get you out, but first hand me the chips in B-12."

Pizza-Matic

"... Wine list? No, we don't have a wine list! Perhaps I can get sir something from the vending machine?"

Honest Vending Machine

"Yes! I defeated the invading forces! I am master and commander... I am a warlord!"

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

"I was hoping my bonus would be more than a voucher for the vending machine."

Now With Organic Artifical Additives

What brings you to therapy, Mr. Park? I'm stuck. Dr. Noodle. I'm paralyzed. I'm not making any progress. Honestly, I'm lost in the trees. I've lost sight of my goals. My health units are low. Units? Unseen enemies are everywhere. I can't sleep. I'm not eating. You're not making sense. Who am I kidding? You're right. The truth? Fine, I admit it. I can't get past level 5!!! I don't do video game counseling. If my mom loved me more, I'd be able to find more ammo.

Computer Gamers.

"I ran out of answers before she ran out of questions."

Dang! They're always out of 'handsome and brilliant neurosurgeon!'

'I wanna get out of the rat race, spend more time with the kids and finally nail them at monopoly.'

Far out Man! A pot machine!

Vending Machine Pig Out.

'Here's a twist. Before you go on your quest, an insurance salesman tries to sell you life insurance. If you buy a lot you can date prettier girls.'

"I like to reward productive employees. Here's a 50% off voucher for the vending machine."

'You're being promoted to vice prez of personal energy management! You'll be the guy who goes out for coffee and donuts!'

'And you honey, how was your day at the PlayStation?'