Vehicle Safety Engineer T-Shirts

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

"Have you had a stressful experience lately, such as an accident?"

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

Nice park. . .

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

'The new intelligent dummies aren't working out. They've figured out there's a break!'

'... and make it look like an accident.'

a crash-test dummy is performing some affirmations before going to work

"Don't worry. The building is earthquake proof, but unfortunately we haven't solved the

Alien crash test dummy emerges from downed UFO.

"Yeah, work is tough, but nothing compared to coming home and stepping on one of the kids' legos."

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

Crash Test Dummy's Running Machine

Male Crash-test Dummy: 'So...would you like to go for a crash in my car?'

Things you should know about...

'Never thought I'd see you again - you really must have nine lives.'

'Go ahead and dig, you said! what are the odds there's a pipe right there, you said!'

'Did I mention the gas mileage?!'

'We just need to increase our collision policy enough to cover the amount of damage to our car from Joy backing into our neighbor's car, rick.'

"You'd think they'd at least offer health insurance with this job."

"At the first opportunity, make a U-turn."

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

"Around here, we call it 'Roadkill Highway'. . ."

"The latest car safety data is in, and it's still really really bad to crash into things."

Where airbags should be.

'Hey, look, the sprinkler system works.'

"You know what's about to happen and you still got in the car. But yet I'm called the dummy."

"I see your son has a summer job."

I'm with stupid

'No, it only has a driver-side airbag.'