Vegetarian Experimenter Pillows

"It's her choice to become a vegetarian, but it's unfair that we're being fed tofu now!"

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Before/After

Vegetarian Birds

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

A dozen predictions for foods of the future.

"I think my mom made me a tofu sandwich."

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'

'Remove the fur and claws and these genetically engineered apples taste just fine.'

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

Italian Style Fish 'n' Chips

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

"While the chef's dishes tonight are rather bland, his ideas are fresh and appealing."

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

''Spiced mill cider and home made apple pie.' Am I supposed to freshen the room with this or have it for dessert?'

Macho Vegetarian

"How would you like your soy protein, mixed tocopherols and methylcellulose patty?"

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'I made it chocolate so it wouldn't show the dirt.'