Vegetable Fancier T-Shirts

"You have such beautiful eyes."

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Advocado

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

"We're odd looking but just as good."

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

King Alfred's Daffodil's.

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

Vegetarian Birthdays.

Pea

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

'Needs more kale.'

Runner Bean...

As soon as he began speaking Manuel's Spanish accent was unmistakeable and he was evicted from the Local food group.

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

'Not here, Fred.'

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

"I think we can take you off the cabbage diet now"

Free salad bar.

"I'm pleased to say our dishes all have too much kale."

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'

"That's not fair. I do not only visit you once a year on National Asparagus Day."

"In my previous life I was arugula."

Artichoking victim

You mixed your DNA with that of a carrot? I've created a giant loud-mouthed left-leaning vegetable. Some would say that's redundant. Very funny. It's worse that that. The carrot doesn't share just my politics … You smell beautiful, like ranch dressing on a spring day. I do like a tall vegetable.

Untold Love Stories "Beauty and the Beets". We think you would be more beautiful if you dyed your hair a purplish red.

Forbidden Vegetable

Cheeky boy and putting 'leeks' sign on toilet.

F&E Produce. I had interesting customers today. First, a beautician checked out the purple potatoes and yellow beets. Ah, a hair stylist inspected the colored roots! That card shark bought some fruit. Two pears, I'll bet! A journalist was searching for an onion alternative. He needs leeks! And labor negotiators requested to increase their usual vegetable order. They asked for a celery hike, eh? I think the customers are the best part of this job. Yeah, you never know who will turnip!

Today: Tomato Surprise. Of course the tomato surprise doesn't impress you, sir … You’re not a tomato.

The Perfect Garden.

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.