Vatican Vacationer Gifts

The Pope visits Cuba.

"First class, or with children?"

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

'I thought this was supposed to be a holiday.'

'This is where we go to get away from it all. . . except for Stanley's money.'

Kids ask repetitively: 'Is the recession over yet?'

"I'm telling you, those are not abs!"

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

Dance of the Red (Papal) Shoes.

"Migration? I love chasing the endless summer, but travelling such distances with kids is exhausting..."

'After the tone, please leave your name and number.'

'That's funny, everybody else is going downstream.'

"Mom said never use that dirty 4-letter word on vacation...DIET."

'The cruises and long vacations ensure I'm not micro-managing.'

"Yaffle: For the funny bone in you"

Sometimes nature not only calls; she makes an emergency breakthrough.

'Look Mum, we've buried Dad in the sand!'

'It's nice to go hiking together. It gives us a chance to compare notes and figure out what the kids are plotting!'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

'Ahh, mannn! I thought you said this was a NUDE beach!' Two guys overlooking a clothed beach hoping it wasn't

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

Monk on the beach

Take your time coming back...they're looking for scapegoats.

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

'I wonder if there's a message up there somewhere.'

"Don't worry, darling! I've set something up so the kids don't get bored on the trip."

Satellite Navigation for children - "How many more miles is it?"

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

Overdoing it.

'Maybe that'll teach you not to argue with the waiter over the bill!'

'How was your holiday?'

'Looks like this beach has already been claimed.'