Vampiric Techie Pillows

"Just because you don't die doesn't mean your phone battery doesn't. You actually have to charge it."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

If Disney was a software company

Boombox

Halloween Selfie

IMHOtep

"I've been feeling healthier since I attached my fitbit to the collar of my neighbor's terrier."

Snake with headphones.

"This one comes with a special undo function for erasing any stupid thing you've done or said in your entire life. It doesn't really work, of course, but it's SUPER fun to play with!"

The Hard Drive Ate My Homework.

Computer literate Monk

"The last vampire who lived in it spared no expense on upgrades. Especially when it comes to the latest technology."

'You CAN Pass The Turing Test!'

Peep-A-Boo Spyware: 'Your Privacy is Our Eminent Domain!'

"And for my next trick, I will attempt to work on this PC for ten minutes without it crashing!"

'I just love this new ring tone.'

'This spreadsheet program has really been enhanced since I installed the Ouija board.'

"I wrote it, dear...the Great American Password."

Plugged In

'I think I've found what's causing a funny sound in your hard drive.'

"I can't be sure, but I think Dracula is the bat holding the phone."

"I'm hexting."

"That must be Java Man!"

"It's a smart refrigerator that requires a password to open it. They always use one of our names. Their lack of creativity has finally caught up with them."

"I can tell much more about you if I read your Palm Pilot."

Smartphone and Smart Arse Phone.

"I see balloons, food and drinks. Not only are there ants in our keyboard, they seem to be having a party."

"What do you say we go to the Genius Bar and get a bite to eat?"

Hippex

The Kindle was first used used by Santa to keep track of the lists of naughty and nice children, and was originally called the Cringle.

"High tech genies?"

Vampire Selfies

"I set your phone to alert you every five minutes of what I want for Christmas. It's annoying, but very effective."

'Will you be able to shrink their heads with just broad band connection?'

"Thanks for the keyboard, grandma. But it's not the type I'm in need of."