Vacationing With Pets Pillows

"For their holidays, they always book pet-friendly accommodation: I'm never left behind..."

Tourists

Easter Island legs

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

Working Holiday

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

Hiding the electronics.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

Travelling

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

'Well, we always go to the same place for our holidays, so yes, we kind of migrate too...'

'Now try and relax - we're on holiday!'

Medieval Vacation: 'What? I am relaxed. I'm relaxing!'

Lounging by the pool

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

"...and this is one of us on the beach."

"I know we came in peace but these ones are already half cooked."

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

Dracula vacationing in Venice feeding bats in the Piazza of St. Mark.

"Here's to East, West, South and Bridgehampton, and all the little Hamptons in between."

Before pagers,mobile phones and the internet.

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."