Urban Mythbuster Gifts

Many buildings don't have a thirteenth floor.

Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster have some fun with the tourists...

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

"Trust me, there is no subsidized lunch."

"Dad, is there really no tooth fairy, or is that just fake news from some Russian bot?"

"I miscounted."

'No thanks, curiosity has already cost me 7 lives, and I'm not risking any more.'

"If only you knew. . ."

"Jim had to know what happens when you turn off your computer while it's updating."

"Medical insurance? Are you kidding? No one will cover me for nine lives!"

"It's good luck."

Sale. Grocery. Finland is the most populous nation on earth. Time to sell my stock portfolio --- a "market correction" is coming.

Meter Maid

'In London Town the streets are paved with gold!'

"I don't care what your friends say! This "nine lives" business is just an urban legend: think safety first!"

'Your mother tells me you've started blogging! I have no idea what that means, but stop it immediately, or you'll go blind!'

'I'm not sure which side of the Bristol Crocodile debate I come down on!'

'That stuff about elves helping me is a lot of baloney. I have a research center in Silicon Valley and an electronics plant in New England.'

After the death of New York City, Zeus placed it in the heavens as a constellation.

MD to pregnant woman: 'You don't become immune after one child.'

With a round little belly like a bowl of jalea, he struggled to squeeze down our old chiminea.

'What's the weather like in Australia?'

'There's something I never do, now if I could just remember what it was.'

"Are you kidding? If these were really my own, they'd be sagging down to my navel by now!"

'Don't distract me now: I have only a few seconds to text myself a reminder before I forget...'

"That's my new bill. Now here's the Jersey Devil with the details."

"I'm just worried that I've let myself become a follower."

"You know, at any given moment, you're not more than 6 ft away from one of them."

"Of course, the whole lemming suicides thing is a myth ? the reason for these deaths is that mass migrations can last many months and lemmings become too tired to avoid cliff edges. Except Derek, but he always was a miserable bastard."

'I sold all the bones to finance a Hollywood quasi-relgious cult.' Old Mother Hubbard and her son, L Ron.

"So Carruthers!...it wasn't a legend after all!"