Urban King T-Shirts

The King Of L.A.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"See? And you said you couldn't work from home."

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

Wifi in Hell

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

No Immediate Danger

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

"Walt Disney on ice."

Packed like sardines

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

"National Metaphor Day by the looks of it."

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

Is Driving Doomed?

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

"Right now it's between you and two hundred and fifty other people who came to Seattle, moved in with five roommates, joined a band, took a job in a coffee bar, got fed up, had a meeting with themselves, and decided it was time to go out and find a real job."

"Love the bag, Stell! Very career."

"Yup! Its time to feed the cattle."

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

Highlights From The Annual Central Park Country Fair

"The dangers of texting while walking #17"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.