Urban Birder T-Shirts

Stories about crumbs

"Dear sir....Today I heard the first cuckoo ringtone."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

City Marathon.

Touring Cyclist

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"I travel Prada whenever I can."

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

Upper West Side Story

'The problem with migrating is that the roaming charges for my mobile phone are enormous...'

"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."

Squirrel Tapping On Window Demanding Food.

"Hard to believe this was all rain forest just fifteen years ago."

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

baby birds in a nest reading Chick Lit

"Thank you."

'Yes, the walls ARE thin, but you'll be happy to know a world-famous rapper lives in the next unit.'

"Scat!"

Auld Gang Sign

'How do they know it's breakfast time? It's your garden clock, birdbrain!'

Hot dog cart next to a hot spot cart.

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

'I can't get John to do a thing to the garden!'

Bird at birdbath shaving.

Old Yarns

"...A meaningful epiphany or just a line from some dumb TV commercial?"

'...and ski conditions will be excellent on city streets today.'

An ellipsis in the sky

Man walking along sidewalk trips on long trombone from street musician

"Just think- if it really was 'unlivably small,' would they have installed a permanent Ping-Pong table?"