Upgrading Home Electronics Gifts

'The program is stupid, primitive, embarrassing, and boring. I want to buy a new telly.'

'Wow, thanks for putting it into context. My 42-inch plasma really is obsolete.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"Maybe you set it up wrong."

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

TV: widescreen 16x9 versus 4x3.

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

'Well, I finally made the switch from cable to satellite.'

'I was walking past the washers and dryers and one of my socks disappeared.'

"I upgrade then it's obsolete and I have to upgrade again! As soon as I upgrade I have to upgrade again! Upgrade! Upgrade!! Always upgrade!!"

'Darling, wake up, I've just realised ... we're not HD ready.'

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

"See. I told you they have Roomba Rodeos when we're gone."

"I'm spending way-y-y too much time watching my ultra-wide TV."

'We need a new TV, Dad — it's stupid watching 'Reading Rainbow' in black and white.'

"And, in suburban news, construction of the new, attached four-season solarium at 6870 Evercrest Drive continued amid the silent, seething envy of the neighbors."

'Couldn't you just leave that here until we're sure the new system works?'

"If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

'Explain to me again how a trip to the mall to buy shoelaces resulted in this!'

"This home comes with all the latest technology. As part of the tech package, tech-support will live with you until you figure out how to use it all."

'Granny buys wide-screen TV'

'Don't Worry - They Never Think It'

'Nice penthouse.'

'Have you considered buying a new computer?'

"Our smart home just texted us. It said instead of binge watching shows, we should be updating it. It wants us to start with the kitchen."

'When did this office become a museum?'

"I've been trying for ages to get that old skinflint to buy me a modern cooker!"

"I thought I'd go digital this year."

'That ought to keep the neighbors from sneaking in and using the pool while we're away!'

"It's guaranteed for the life of the product which, obviously, ended when it broke."