Unwanted Pregnancy Gifts

'So that's two Pinot Grigios and a Baby Sham. We hope.'

'Sorry Mrs Jones, but they're unlikely to raise the age to 13.'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Cry babies.

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

'ooh! A womb with a view.'

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

31. 19. 55.7.

A little bird told me...

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"