University Speaker Gifts

'In conclusion, I hope you all go out there, get well-paying jobs, and give lots of tax-deductible gifts to our alumni fund.'

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

They hated me.

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Campaign for Plain English

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"I had a fear of speaking in front of people, which is why I shadow puppet and sing the lessons."

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Make a lot of money."

Inclusive speech

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Carmel Buildings, Portman Square: A temperance meeting.

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

U of Debt

Dialogue

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

"Any questions?"

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."