University Hero Gifts

'Oh, no! Is it rag week again already?'

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

Nervous Oral Testing

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Good luck with all the revision...

PROBLEM AREAS

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

Children jumping onto mattress in PE.

"If something that doesn't kill me only makes me stronger, then I should be Atlas!"

'This handheld computer is very useful for teaching. It displays my lesson plan, calander, key files, and an extensive menu of put-downs for hecklers and classroom clowns.'

'While outsourcing is a common business practice, you may not ousource your research and homework assignments, Fletcher.'

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

"I passed the three R's. Now I need some R and R!"

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

Nervous Student

"She's a high grade teacher."

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

'Good luck with your exams' (mountain climbers).

"Of course, that's only a first draft."

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

Help. High performing teacher trapped in low performing pay scale.

Yeah, that's mine - My mom puts my name inside my helmet in case it comes off.

'Ok, class, let's take attendance. Joey?'

'I told you she could get them all in under a minute. Now pay up.'

Fitness Course.

Med School Mascots.

"I need you to line up by attention span."

"I was thinking, maybe karate isn't for me. Tio Ruben was a golden glove boxer. Maybe I can take up boxing! You don't know anything about boxing, do you, Tia Carmen?"

Jeff makes some nice jugs.

I must not erase major breakthroughs....

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

Hey, Twig! Ryan Beardsley wants your cell phone number! The divine wonder of West Fester High? Finally! My life changes for the better. He needs activities for his college apps and wants to come to our shortest eco-club cleanup. Change you can believe in. West Fester High School.

'Right lad, now it's my turn for free expression . . . (I wish!)'