High School Hero Gifts

"Oh, sure, high school. I remember now."

"Nicole, Kyle, would you guys burn my yearbook?"

Hey, Twig! Ryan Beardsley wants your cell phone number! The divine wonder of West Fester High? Finally! My life changes for the better. He needs activities for his college apps and wants to come to our shortest eco-club cleanup. Change you can believe in. West Fester High School.

'Sorry, it's not programmed to find you a date.'

PROBLEM AREAS

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Exam

Come on! They're posting the spring musical. I can't wait! I want a romantic part! With and elegant gown. Good luck with that! We're doing "Cats."

"I started a collection!"

'Does this get me a purple heart?'

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

"I got an 'A' - and all my research was from infomercials."

'Get up and put your house slippers on! - You'll be late for home school!'

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

"I got an 'A' for my anti-gravity science project!"

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

I love Basketball.

'Between the school assignments, sports classes, and dance lessons, I hardly have any time to spend with my dolls.'

Child stands on Math help books to reach blackboard.

'I have a math test tomorrow, Sir, and I could use a godsend multiplicationwise.'

'Good luck with your exams' (mountain climbers).

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

"I got an A in not being annoying!"

'Billy takes his jungle gym seriously!'

"I got the highest grade in the class, except the giraffe."

'Straight A's. That means good.'

'Right now my plate's full juggling school and parents.'

"We moved here for the schools."

'Teachers' Dreams.''Did you just say F***? Care to repeat it so everyone can hear you or is even a four letter word beyond your abilities? ... And the state expects me to make you multisyllabic.'

"It helps to read a grade level ahead!"

'I don't mind school, but I'm really tired of the commute.'

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

'He's here to hit the high notes.'