Unfiltered Underwater Humor Gifts

'Hey, bartender! This scotch is watered down!'

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Say Bernie, how come this little guy's been following you around all week?"

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

"Krill, baby, krill."

Guide fish.

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

Shark food pyramid.

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

Shark Chum

Another hot flash?

Early design for the Two-Man Kayak.

Fish Farm.

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

Prawn Shop

"You're goin' up the river, Sammy."

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

"Of course I'm self-absorbed. I'm a sponge!"

"It's been over for a while now. I caught him trying to fertilize some catfish eggs in June."

How Lawyers Evolved.

Maybe yuou simply have too many omega 3 fatty acids

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

"Fear of getting caught is understandable, but I think your fear of water requires pharmaceutical intervention."

Fish: 'WHOA,Gesundheit!' / A Fish has sneezed out all of his scales

'That still doesn't make you a big fish!'

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

Acme Coffee Co.

'You see these things, you don't bite them, you suck them out...'

Florida Wildlife - Noodle Fish Special

Whale Pattern Balding

'I'm a Pisces.'

The evolution of synchronizes swimmers.