Unexpected Romantic Gifts

"I still can't believe that you've booked a table for two on our anniversary you old romantic!"

Border Security

'I admire your persistence, Melvin, but I'm in love with another woman.'

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

"I hate it when we fight."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'Sorry, everyone. That last chart kind of startled me.'

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"Recess does things to a man."

Romance of Radio Astronomy

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

King and Jester

Cupid and stork ambush young couple.

'Wanna see my tadpole collection?'

Cupid

"The party was a total surprise! Everybody jumped out and screamed 'Happy Birthday' just as I was licking my balls!"

"It's the Chef Surprise."

Egg Surprise

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

'Be careful opening this...it's marked dangerous goods.'

Soup Surprise

Jack-in-a-box popping out of a computer monitor.

"Surprised?"

Proposal on a snowboard

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

'My daughter eloped with a mime...'

"They were only supposed to find truffles, but then they found Roger - a man who curiously smells a lot like truffles."

'Het Dad, I don't need a bike from Santa anymore. I just found one behind your wardrobe!'

'It was a surprise quiz to me and the teacher - I passed!'

'I love doing surprise inspections.'

Mom, I gotta hang up. Jill's about to find the diamond I hid under the bacon she always refuses to eat!

Jack-in-the-box reads 'It's almost March again!'

"I'm a fancier of dogs and interesting men."