Unemployment Challengers Pillows

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"Will follow you on social media for food."

"But if you were a real boy you wouldn't be allowed to work such long hours."

New Memer/Incumbent

Bee Chess

Social security.

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

'You're offering me a job, eh? -- does it have portable benefits?'

ASDA Redundancies

"While your idea is novel and innovative, it questions the status quo and can harm those entrenched in this organization. I'm ruling it out as being too disruptive."

"And now Professor Weyfeld, of Columbia University, with some liberal claptrap."

Will work for question marks.

Social Networking Sites for the Unemployed

'You've written a bold and innovative proposal. Unfortunately, it challenges the status quo and that can jeopardize my job.'

Trouble

'I've set a new default retirement age.'

"I've been at home in a fired capacity."

". . . And may I ask . . . who's crawling?"

'This is called waiting by the phone for months.'

"The plumber is here."

"I think next year things will really be different."

There is no normal: Norm hated the new motivational poster and it hated him.

'Harold stopped looking for a job to protest the price of gasoline.'

'Hey Moses - that's cheating!'

'Are you actively seeking job rejection letters?'

Job Centre closed sign.

Tax Forum

Snotty MBAs

'Congratulations graduates. We are here to help with your resume preparation and unemployment insurance applications.'

"Today's man lesson is 'The Art of Promising'."

You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! I met a lady a while back. We're both stuck in marriages we don't want to be in. We'd rather be together but we don't have the courage to end things. What do you mean "courage"? Ending things isn't "courageous," it's cowardly. Courage means not running from misery, but embracing it, becoming its master, and delivering it upon all those around you with vengeance.

Help wanted, but not really expected.

Vertical evolution.

'You were fired after 25 years of hard and reliable work? Wow... I bet now you know how it feels to be treated like a dog!'