Underemployment Pundit Pillows

Snotty MBAs

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

'Yes, can I help you?'

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

'You must be the only 'Jack-of-all-trades' who is out of work in all of them!'

"I just need help getting started. A little seed money."

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

"Victims of out-sorcery."

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

"I'm sorry, Davis, but your face no longer fits."

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is, calling the committee on Progress and Evolution a bunch of know-it-all nincompoops might have felt good when you said it, but..."

"Well, YOU tell personnel you need every winter off and see if you get a job!"

"We pay the living dead wage."

'We heat the entire building by burning resumes.'

Maybe it's time to stop giving our bones to a broker and start burying them in the backyard again.

America's Biggest Export...

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

Social security.

Two bored males hanging out on a tatty sofa.

'I like your appearance. I'm sure we can find you a place in the company.'

"Right now, I'm between naps."

Right,so you're looking for someone with magic circle experience in M&A ,litigation and finance with a set of blue chip clients and the freedom to work ANYWHERE...would you like them to walk on water and turn water into wine as well?

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

"Our plan is to hire the first person we find not under federal investigation."

'I was afraid I would be replaced by a computer but not by a toaster oven for the staff lounge.'

A Temporary One Day A Year Job Is Not Enough, I Want A Permanent Job!

'Can you dance?'

Personnel - "I liked the one that saluted."

Job Centre: Settle for Early Retirement.

'Lost my job, house repossessed, but at least I've still got you.'

Unemployment Math

'Oh, I'm unemployed -- but it's not as exciting as it sounds.'

Inflate a job!