Underwater Worrier T-Shirts

"I know there's safety in numbers, but I suffer from enochlophobia: Can you help me?"

A Hole in the Dike

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

Things that go beep in the night.

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

Separation Anxiety

'Ten things you should be worried about.'

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

'Silent type, eh?'

'I'm not convinced you need tranquillizers to switch phone provider.'

"Oh, for crying out loud, Lou... just go in the water!"

'We do a lot for the ecosystem.'

Mrs. Tree? A hockey ball hit your daughter. It's likely just a bad bruise. Whew! Though there could be a fracture, nerve damage or fatal blood clots. What? Don't worry. Our medical advisor is evaluating Twig right now. Can you sign this liability waiver? Her hand seems fine. Team lawyer.

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

'If we could just sink Noah's Ark, think of the variety of food we could sample...'

'If you don't stop thinking about that waitress, I'm leaving!'

'She was upset about breaking up with 'Phoenix',your 'plenty more fish in the sea' just made it worse!'

'If all the red warning lights come on, it means meltdown, so get out of the car fast!'

"It's just until the air conditioning in our house is fixed."

"You hear that? New Zealand plans to tax cow burps. You have been warned!"

'No, I've never yet broken any swimming records, why do you ask?'

It was a bad day for Mr Effervescent

"All I'm saying is, I wished for an endless summer vacation, and now the glaciers are melting."

'Our office is on the 14th floor, Peters... you should forget about rising sea levels.'

'I told you this house was too near the nuclear reactor. My G-gnome's already been damaged.'

"Dad, I'm thirsty again!"

'Do you want to reconsider? Headquaters just said we're going green.'

Expectation - Man Awaits Tree So He Can Hang Himself.

"Everyone has to start somewhere."

"Oh, great, the warranty is up."

'Hello, my name is Sam. Come to this watering hole very often?'

'Your dog is worrying my sheep. . .'

Although not an UNQUALIFIED success the climate summit has pointed us in the RIGHT DIRECTION...and we are confident that in the FULLNESS of time with APPROPRIATE levels of investment then there is a strong POSSIBILITY that there will be SOME ....BUGGER!