Underwater Conversationalists T-Shirts

'I wish somebody would say something.'

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Geez, Bob. . . Now you're equating both marriage living in Florida to death?!!. . .Ah. . . so the restraining order by Disneyworld is still in effect?'

"I've never had a bird's eye view of anything."

Chicken soup for the sole.

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'Silent type, eh?'

'I don't care how smart you think you are, you're still a bird brain.'

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

"I'd love to stay and chat but I just heard a silent dog whistle."

"... and the fact that I ain't never caught a rabbit should have no bearing on our friendship."

No, no, don't tell me … you lost weight? You cut your hair? Wait, did you used to wear glasses?

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

"So I leave eggs on the ground, and then you come along and drop your whatever on them? That's your idea of romance?"

"It's odd, but once I'm full, the last thing I want to smell is blood in the water."

"It's not the walking — it's the waiting."

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

"No, I don't recycle."

'I told you, never utter that four letter work - 'walk!''

"The truth is, humans aren’t smart enough to know how intelligent we are."

'Do you know something? If I couldn't eat, I would just die!'

Fish-losophy

'Woof, woof, woof - but I'm paraphrasing.'

"She's definitely had work done on her tail."

"I can clearly see from the colour of your rings that your have some anger issues...!"

'Dad, I've joined the Police: The Taser Unit!'

"I'll have my people call your people."

"What is it about us that makes only crazy people want to talk to us?"

"Not to be a killjoy, but this happened on our property. Are liable?"

Fish with a hook tells a good tale.

'Hey! Not fair!'

Deepwater Fish

'Say 'Nessage in a gottle.' one more time and I'm putting you back in your box.'