Unconventional Strategist Gifts

Stun-gun target practice.

"Any questions?"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

Cactus seats.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'She'll never look for me here.'

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

You are much more likely to think outside the box if it is broken.

"Things are looking up!"

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'Just do the presentation Williams and let the numbers speak for themself.'

The Contrarian funds

'I am constantly diversifying my toy portfolio.'

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

Business man reading 'Thinking Outside the Chair'

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

"This is never going to work—you're a tree!"

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

"He's a loose cannon with nothing left to lose, but he's the best damn file clerk I've ever seen."

CX909708

"I didn't want this book to end, so I stopped reading it midway."

'If you know what's good for you Allan, you'll let me pass.'

'I'm sending him out to drum up new business.'

BUSINESS PRESCHOOL

"I'm in advertising. . ."

'No, you can't write off the cost of your wake-up call service.'