Unconventional Entertainer Pillows

'My snake is old. First, I have to wake him.'

"Extreme miming"

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

Off Off Off Off Broadway

'Don't you ever knock?'

Man playing a harmonica on a exercise bike bores customers in a restaurant

Pottery Slam

'Yes, yes, Rupert, you are still a mighty hunter. Now, please bring the turkey back to Luisa in the kitchen.'

Roller Coasters

'It's a new reality show about a reality show producer...'

'Sorry, Bobo. With all the e-mailed jokes today, office clowns are passe.'

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

A cocktail in a tuba

New Belief Systems

"Okay. So, apart from being a very shy ventriloquist, is there anything else you can tell me about him?"

"How much do you want off the top?"

"Thanks, you've been a great audience. I'm Jerry and I'm here all week."

"Would you like to see my one-woman show about the specials?"

"I don't get it. Who doesn't love a circus?"

Tom Waits.

'Nice Touch!'

Pollution Free Cocktail Cabinet

Monk Parrot.

"I don't think air guitar counts."

Home Video

'You need to slow down - use more color.'

'It's girl power - she sacked her manager.'

'Sorry... I should've warned you. In our company, we're encouraged to color outside the lines!'

Ventriloquists dummy

Hospital bed shortages

"We outsourced our joyless TV dinners to a delightful couple from next door."

'When the alarm clock went off this morning, he said 'I'll drink to that.''