Umbrella Entrepreneur Gifts

"We both got rich from selling umbrellas when it was raining. My umbrellas just happened to have fallen off the back of a truck."

"Welcome to the future"

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'Can our software do that?'

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"I used to want to be an astronaut, but now I think I'd rather be a billionaire space tourist."

US v.s. Tech Giants

Mark Zuckerberg

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

"Boss... I just read an article about trans-humanism. Apparently, sometime in the next 50 years, it will become possible to live forever."

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"Gentlemen, may I present our company's future. A buggy whip... with Bluetooth!"

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

Online Shopping.

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

"Our cloud computing services include IaaS, PaaS, SaaS, NaaS, CaaS...and BaaS!"

"Social media stocks have taken a beating I'm seeing a lot of avatars on ledges."

'The 'Business Man's Lunch?' The chicken salad comes served in a laptop.'

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

Watering the garden in the rain.

Smith and Hobson: People replacing people with apps and robots since 2009.

"I made my first million tech consulting explaining the cloud to clients."

Well you know what they say - here today gone tomorrow - or in the case of dotcoms, here today gone shortly after lunch.

'Your tea is getting cold.'

"Give us a chip."

“He runs the top Virtual Reality company in the world. In fact, that’s not really him.”

"I worked on an early version of the Cloud. I call it the Fog because it never got off the ground."

'You see this app? It starts a revolution.'

Computer tycoon, 'It's that nerd-do-well from next door,'

Mega Corp: An Incubator for emerging technologies.

'Quit if you want, Bowman, but the intellectual property stays here.'