Ulysses Admirer Gifts

James Joyce

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

"Just when you're about to lose faith in humanity, you see Shakespeare in the Park."

Love

'Doesn't txt msg make it 38 languages and not 37?'

"I told you a firecracker behind his back didn't seem like a good idea!"

Jason and the Aga notes,

'A message from the Vikings, sire. It says, 'we've got spirit! Yes, we do! We've got spirit! How about you!?'

"It appears to be a giant boil, sire."

"We've all said things about heliocentricity that look bad when taken out of context."

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

Blue Dress

Young Elvis

"There's nothing magical about if, actually I just have a knack for this sort of thing."

Tristan and Isolde

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"

Poetry Buff.

Magician Playing Golf.

'Shh, wait! -- I'm getting an astral message from Sigmund Freud!'

"Yorick, you dolt! Alas, poor Yorick!"

"Nemesisyphus"

'Good heavens, Foster, we seem to have stumbled upon man's earliest attempt at cartooning!'

Euripides

Silvi-Culture.

Prehistoric Pirates.

'Friends, Romans, countrymen, take back your ears. We have a surplus.'

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

"I hate Neanderthals!"

"I hate to be a downer, but, statistically, people are more likely to die of heart disease than by getting

"I suppose you're like me, only signed up for the free uniform."

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Graeae

Cakeless.

"A fire-breathing dragon represents the conflict you have with the Lord of the Manor."