Twister T-Shirts

'We were playing Twister at a party. . . there was a loud popping noise.'

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

Astronaut runs on spinning asteroid to reach space shuttle's tether.

Curtsey

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'If we are to reorientate our forward facing rhetorical platform we must rephrase our message to cross fertilise the core message..holistically!'

Hanukkah tree

'Obviously, I know a lot of weasel words, so I would be great in a business development role...'

'Aunty Em!...Toto!...It's a twister...It's a twister!'

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

Jack and the Beanstalk.

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

' I don't think we're in Kansas any more ...'

Polo pony

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

Elevator choices: Up, Down, Different Narrative.

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

'He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.'

'I can't seem to find the 'surprise' ending.'

"You know... this would be as good a time as any to rotate the tyres."

Playing game on Cow.

"I agree, Glenn. The first sentence needs to hook the reader."

"It's the grisly story of the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a brilliant novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who..."

"I never lie to my parents, but sometimes we do interpret event differently."

Serf faints as apple is shot from his head by an arrow.