Twister And Turner Pillows

"Michael, your father and I are worried that you're awfully young to be singing the blues."

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

Astronaut runs on spinning asteroid to reach space shuttle's tether.

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

Curtsey

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'Another nice wave.'

Hanukkah tree

Signs of prehistoric party behavior.

Jack and the Beanstalk.

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

Mono-Tasking, Multi-Tasking, No-No Tasking and Nada Tasking.

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

'I have this constant ringing in my ears. I think I have tinnitus.' - 'Does it sound like an 'eeeeeee' or a 'shhhhh'?' - 'It's like the murmer of a thousand forgotten souls quietly lamenting past sorrows.' - 'Hmmm. I don't have a checkbox for that, sadly.

'I started at the bottom, running mazes in the lab.'

John Ruskin

"Well, I was under oath, so I couldn't lie outright, but I'm a weasel of course, so I have a way with words..."

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

'He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.'

"I never lie to my parents, but sometimes we do interpret event differently."

Students singing 'Now we know our A-B-Os'

'Nice! And what other interests do you have besides jamming?'