Talent Twister Pillows

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

Astronaut runs on spinning asteroid to reach space shuttle's tether.

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

Curtsey

'If we are to reorientate our forward facing rhetorical platform we must rephrase our message to cross fertilise the core message..holistically!'

Hanukkah tree

'Obviously, I know a lot of weasel words, so I would be great in a business development role...'

Signs of prehistoric party behavior.

"I warned you about those contortions, Mr. Dershowitz."

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

Mono-Tasking, Multi-Tasking, No-No Tasking and Nada Tasking.

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

Jack and the Beanstalk.

'I have this constant ringing in my ears. I think I have tinnitus.' - 'Does it sound like an 'eeeeeee' or a 'shhhhh'?' - 'It's like the murmer of a thousand forgotten souls quietly lamenting past sorrows.' - 'Hmmm. I don't have a checkbox for that, sadly.

'I started at the bottom, running mazes in the lab.'

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

"Well, I was under oath, so I couldn't lie outright, but I'm a weasel of course, so I have a way with words..."

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

Elevator choices: Up, Down, Different Narrative.

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

'I can't seem to find the 'surprise' ending.'

'He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.'